Women need a reason to have sex Men just need a place.

Billy Crystal

According to a new survey, women say they feel more comfortable undressing in front of men than they do undressing in front of other women. They say that women are too judgmental, where, of course, men are just grateful.
Robert De Niro

There’s a new medical crisis. Doctors are reporting that many men are having allergic reactions to latex condoms. They say they cause severe swelling. So what’s the problem?
Dustin Hoffman

There’s very little advice in men’s magazines, because men think, I know what I’m doing. Just show me somebody naked.
Jerry Seinfeld

Sex alleviates tension. Love causes it.
Woody Allen

See, the problem is that God gives men a brain and a penis, and only enough blood to run one at a time.
Robin Williams

My family never raised me to have a vagina.
Roseanne

An intellectual is a person who has discovered something more interesting than sex.
Aldous Huxley

Did you ever notice the people who are most adamantly against abortions are people you wouldn’t want to fuck in the first place?
George Carlin

Of the delights of this world man cares most for sexual intercourse, yet he has left it out of his heaven.
Mark Twain

One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other.
Jane Austen

Sex concentrates on what is on the outside of the individual. It’s funny because I think it’s better inside.
Alex Walsh

When a man goes on a date, he wonders if he is going to get lucky. A woman already knows.
Frederike Ryder